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Showing posts from 2013

Impulsive Decisions

As someone highly interested in both biology (more specifically, genetics) and spirituality, this excerpt from Elizabeth Lesser really grabbed my attention.   >>> My friend told me a story about her 3-year-old grandson who hit a toddler who was visiting their house. The parent of the visiting little girl yelled at my friend’s grandson, who dissolved into tears of confusion and self-recrimination. Later, my friend asked her grandson why he had hit the baby, and he said, “I didn’t hit her; my body did.” This led to a conversation about impulse control and other things you try to teach a human child about getting along with others in this world.   It's hard being a human with all of our impulses—purely physical ones, or hidden emotional ones, or the kind of impulses that spring from defensiveness, or fear, or old wounds. I have been so aware of this lately because I am doing an active experiment with my own impulse control. I started the experiment when I learned that my s

And You Get Tomatoes

[I ’ve been out of sorts – I’ve stretched myself too thin] Earlier this week, an older gentleman stopped into my office. After their meeting while waiting for his colleague to follow him out, he and I began a simple conversation to pass the time. He spoke of his wife of 30 years and his daughter who lives in Seattle. Both of his girls enjoy gardening; tomatoes, which he doesn’t much care for, but for them, acts as if he does.  I made a comment regarding advice I’d been given, “gardening is cheaper than therapy.” The latter part of that quote would be, “and you get tomatoes.” He boomed with laughter – the kind that touches your soul and splashes around in the river that flows through your body. Upon gathering himself he said, “Therapy! That’s understandable. My girls sure need it sometimes, but boy, even when they're crazy, what fun they are to be around." With each description his face would light up. The way he spoke and his verbal illustrations were hitting me with

37 of Life’s Most Common Problems via Chris Mccombs

1. Need more money? Add more value to the world. 2. Bored? Man, life’s too short to be bored—go do something fun 3. Too many commitments? Say “no” more often 4. Stressed out? Meditate, exercise, do that shit you’ve been putting off; don’t take yourself so seriously; stop trying to control things; change what you can and accept what you can’t, remember that most of your problems are actually a good thing and opportunities to learn and grow; and embrace the fact that today—this moment actually—is all there is; everything else is fiction 5. Don’t like the way you look? Accept yourself as you are—flaws and all—and change what you can change and want to change. Eat better, workout more, get some new clothes and a new haircut and pull your shoulders back so your posture is better. 6. Tired? Exercise more, eat better, get more sleep, take vacations and don’t work yourself into the fucking ground. 7. Agitated and tense? Go for a walk 8. Have some big fucking thing growing

[how to] Accept Who You Are

via thought catalog Know yourself. Watch for the things that most heavily lift or sink your heart. These are the markers of who you are. Look at your qualities objectively, especially when they are less than appealing, these are just as important as the great things about you are. Don’t work on accepting the person you project to other people. Be ready to be vulnerable and imperfect. You don’t have to like your imperfections, but you do have to be able to sit with them, acknowledge them and embrace that they are present in you for one reason or another. Dig and find the root of what cultivated them. Work on undoing what needs to be undone; work on being better. This self-acceptance business is not an excuse to be a terrible person. If being yourself means this, you will deal with the consequences of your actions in due time. Don’t think that because you are “being yourself” you are excused from anything that is derogatory toward or detrimental to someone else. Know that you

Live Life Totally Alive

If you surrender to the universe, humble yourself in knowing that all things happen for a reason, and all things come to you in divine order, then you can flow through your life with ease and grace, and all these will come to you. Your debts canceled, your wounds healed, your apologies accepted, your generosity expanded, your love educated, your desires clarified, your untold stories heard, your insight heightened, your load lightened, your wildness rejuvenated, your leaks plugged, your courage stoked, your fears dissolved, your imagination fed. Isn't it time to live life totally alive with wonder, joy, peace, and happiness? --- Fr iedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche , a German philosopher, whose critiques of contemporary culture, religion, and philosophy centered on a basic question regarding the foundation of values and morality. (wiki)      

Point of View

Sitting on the couch with my three month old, making funny faces, observing the light dance around in her eyes as she smiles at my fishy face, is easily my favorite thing in the world. Her scrunched nose, mouth agape smile has utterly changed my world. That face has raised so many questions as to who I want to be in life and how I’d like to see her grow into a little lady. Watching her as she mimics my expressions reiterates that she will continue to follow my lead as she gets older – and that’s a little terrifying. I’ve made mistakes and done things I’m not proud of. I’ve had my heart broken and I’ve been in some dark places. I’ve stayed out all night and missed work the next morning. I’ve raised my voice when I should have opened my mind.. I want to shield her from all that I’ve learned the hard way, but I wouldn’t be the person I am had I not gone down that road myself. There’s a saying, “No one can ever teach us anything, in school or in life, that we are not ready to learn ours

Valentine's Food for Thought -- I Blame Twilight

>>>via Buddhist Boot Camp "Relationships are often misunderstood to be a simple commitment between two people; a dedication to each other with a sense of belonging to one another. Unfortunately, that kind of limited perspective breeds expectations, possessiveness and disappointment, and it reeks of ownership, greed, ignorance, and selfish desire. A healthy relationship is an agreement between two people to support each other's spiritual practice. It is a vow to encourage each other's dedication, devotion and path, free from attachment or expectations (yet full of caring and compassion). A healthy relationship is based on unconditional love, not one where your need is to possess. Although you put plenty of "heart" into it, you lose nothing by giving it away. If each person is equally dedicated to inspire, create, awaken and enrich the lives of others, then there is no hidden agenda. It is far less important what one receives from the other as what one