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Living Authentically: Great Souls and Assholes


I can feel when I'm not living truthfully. When I'm not authentically living, I'm just floating through life relating my experiences to everyone else's. I find myself comparing levels of achievement and accomplishments to those outside of myself. But the thing is, we've all experienced entirely different realities; what one achievement is to one person, to another it's just a day in the life. A world full of complexities has somehow turned to a very minimalists society. To create categories is foolish. A person can't just be a doctor, therapist, decorator, banker, guru.. You're a creator, a thinker, a student in the University of life - among an unlimited amount of other qualities. You're so many things that are entirely different than someone other than yourself. So to compare your experience with another is unnatural and unauthentic. I've noticed personally that what I've gained in life that makes me feel fulfilled and accomplished, isn't what many women my age consider personal gain. Some need material achievements to hang on their walls to feel fulfilled - others hang them in their heart. Whichever it is (maybe both), as long as it truly serves you on your journey, you should embrace it and watch it blossom. 

I visited Barnes and Noble over the weekend and began reading a philosophy book where the author described his relationship with life as if it were his significant other; his soul mate. His experience in research and religion over the years had lead him to an awakened state where his consciousness had become truly fulfilled - he felt at peace with life. Now, from what reading I've done myself on awakening, this man seemed slightly delusional. He described his relationship with life as if it were a woman - he loves her unconditionally, but that doesn't mean there are days when he doesn't demand her affection, want to stomp around loudly, or cry in her arms. But at the core of all things, he still feels comforted that she's there each day. And although at times she can be very rough on him, he grows with each step they take together. I always thought that to be awakened you had to maintain joy and peace in all things, never to stomp loudly (which is why I felt I was always failing!) I loved this line from his book, "because in my experience we're all capable of being great souls and assholes. Right?" He's so right. 

What I'm trying to say is, some people find peace and comfort in certain religions, through spirituality or rituals, while others find comfort in simply living differently day to day. Some of us can sit under a tree meditating for hours, when others need feet to pavement action while listening to Buckcherry's song Crazy Bitch. Not all of us can be what we compare ourselves to, we just have to find what fits and live it authentically. I always beat myself up when I get down on life, and then I start to compare everyone's scenario to my own - do they get sad about this? Do they get angry when this happens? Should I be feeling or doing it this way? From what I've learned so far is that to compare only sets you back. Don't worry, what you're doing is perfectly right if it's authentic to your heart. Do what feeds your soul and watch how your life around you transforms - you may start to find that you do feel best mediating under the tree, even if you are a Buckcherry fan (no one's judging). 
 

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